Too Much Perfection?

After having the wutz, the official plan was to time our next peanut so that the wutz would be three years old upon our second child's birth. Since the wutz will be three in April, it is obvious that our plan was just that. Nothing more. And I'm not complaining. The wutz is a handful. He's got more energy than three normal kids. If you think I'm just saying that since I'm his mother, come over, I'll let you babysit.

But I digress.

Since the plan didn't quite go as well, planned, we are tossing around the possibility of trying for a second in the coming year. I'm not entirely certain I'm ready. However, since I'm always prepared for anything, I thought I'd go ahead and make a Gyn appointment for the first of the year. There was one small problem with that plan, though. My doctor has a waiting list to get on the list to even make an appointment. I got on that list a month ago and I've yet to hear back from anyone. So, I don't even have an appointment! How crazy is that?

Since I really do not like to wait for anything, I am seriously considering shopping around for a new OB/GYN. My options are slim in this one horse town, though. The other office happens to be a former client of mine. I'm not sure I want to see a man I'm that familiar with. I may break down and do it though.

Anyways, back to the babies thing...
...I know I want to have a second child, but I don't know if I'm ready yet. I'm not getting any younger though. What if I lose my mind and decide I want a third? I'll be considered AMA by then and my mother was 40 when she had me, I'm well aware of how stressful the age gap can be.

Ugh. I just don't know. Do you ever really know, though? I think that's the hardest part for me. I guess I'm not quite ready to take that leap. Soon, perhaps.